I am preparing for the radiation treatment which will, hopefully, wipe out any remaining cancer cells which might be hanging out in my body. I take the radiation iodine pill on the 27th and then go into isolation, basically, for a week while I’m radioactive. I have to have my own bathroom and maintain 3 feet distance between myself and all adults for 5 days and I have to do the same for pregnant woman and children (ie, Claire) for 8 days. Since I have a small house with only one bathroom and you can’t explain to a toddler why you won’t pick her up, hug her, or even come near her for 8 days, I am staying at someone else’s house that whole week. This makes me so sad because I’ve only been away from Claire for one night (the night after my surgery). I will miss her (and Huz, but at least I can talk to him on the phone!) terribly.

Before all of this, however, I have to be on a low iodine diet for 2 weeks in order to starve my body of iodine so that it takes up the radioactive version more readily, making it more effective in ablating the thyroid tissue that remains. Now most of you, like I did, probably just assume this means avoiding salt since we all know salt contains iodide (“an essential nutrient” blah, blah, blah). No. I wish it were so. Check out the list of things that are forbidden to me as of tomorrow:

iodized salt (duh)
sea salt
fish or anything that comes out of the sea
ALL dairy products
ALL soy products (uh, hello? what am I supposed to put on my cereal?)
egg yolks (white omelet anyone?)
canned fruits or vegetables
basically anything already made since it all has salt in it (tomato sauce, ketchup, most cereals, etc.)
restuarant food since there is no way to know if they use products mentioned above
any pre-baked items (bread, bagels, etc.) because they have iodine dough conditioners

Foods that are limited are:
meat – I can only eat up to 5 oz. of fresh (not ground) meat a day
grains – I can only have up to 4 servings of grains a day

Oh my God, right? So, what can I eat? Basically fresh vegetables and fruit and homemade bread that has no milk or egg yolks in it. This is going to be freaking awesome. Not.

In preparation for this diet I just ate a huge southern meal from a local soul food restuarant where the line was out the door. I had meat loaf swimming in tomato sauce, mashed potatoes with dressing, and green beans. Peach cobbler is waiting for me just as soon as my stomach settles from the tide of greasy, dee-licious food I dumped into it moments ago.

Wish me luck on the diet. Because, as you can probably tell, I like food and think diets suck.