I took some pictures of my shoes for you. Why? Not because they’re
new or anything, but because I thought you might find it interesting
that I had yet another wardrobe malfunction at work today. As you
recall, Friday’s brown pants were awful and deserved to be tossed
promptly, which they were. I bought a great replacement pair at Ann
Taylor on Sunday and proudly wore them today, grabbing a nice pair of
brown leather heels that I haven’t worn in over a year because I’ve
been avoiding heels since being diagnosed with plantar fasciitis.

Here they are:


I got them somewhere up in Chicago and have worn them maybe a dozen times. I noticed when I put them on this morning that they squeaked when I walked, but I figured it was them voicing malcontent for not being worn in so long. I figured they’d get over it in an hour or so. At some point after lunch, however, I looked down at them and noticed this crack on the side,


which made me notice this rather large crack on the bottom.


Maybe that explains why my feet have been cold all day. Guess I have another good excuse to go shopping, eh?

While uploading these photos, I found some from the costume party that I had forgotten about. Let’s call this series “The Making of a Corky”.

First, you must acquire a surfer dude wig in gray. Put it on and act stoned, you know, to fit the character.



Do a dance.


Drink copious amounts of wine, demonstrating your true fear of wife haircuts.


Pretend you’re a robot Put a bowl on your head for the dreaded wife haircut.


Try to look hot even though you have synthetic hair all over your forehead, making your unibrow look even more uni.



Then hurry the hell home from your conference because I miss you, damn it!