I took some pictures of my shoes for you. Why? Not because they’re
new or anything, but because I thought you might find it interesting
that I had yet another wardrobe malfunction at work today. As you
recall, Friday’s brown pants were awful and deserved to be tossed
promptly, which they were. I bought a great replacement pair at Ann
Taylor on Sunday and proudly wore them today, grabbing a nice pair of
brown leather heels that I haven’t worn in over a year because I’ve
been avoiding heels since being diagnosed with plantar fasciitis.

Here they are:

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I got them somewhere up in Chicago and have worn them maybe a dozen times. I noticed when I put them on this morning that they squeaked when I walked, but I figured it was them voicing malcontent for not being worn in so long. I figured they’d get over it in an hour or so. At some point after lunch, however, I looked down at them and noticed this crack on the side,

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which made me notice this rather large crack on the bottom.

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Maybe that explains why my feet have been cold all day. Guess I have another good excuse to go shopping, eh?

While uploading these photos, I found some from the costume party that I had forgotten about. Let’s call this series “The Making of a Corky”.

First, you must acquire a surfer dude wig in gray. Put it on and act stoned, you know, to fit the character.

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Do a dance.

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Drink copious amounts of wine, demonstrating your true fear of wife haircuts.

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Pretend you’re a robot Put a bowl on your head for the dreaded wife haircut.

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Try to look hot even though you have synthetic hair all over your forehead, making your unibrow look even more uni.

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Then hurry the hell home from your conference because I miss you, damn it!

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